Money expert shares the most difficult conversation of money he and his wife

The millionaire is self -madeAnd the author and TV host Ramit Sethi He knows something or two about money. He even published books on How to become rich And how Couples can manage their money together.

But his financial journey was not perfect. He recently sat with his wife, Cassandra, for a special episode for him Funds for podcast couples They answered some of the same questions that couples ask every week in an interview with friend Julie Naguin.

Sethis was Married since 2018And Ramtit often participated in the tales about their relationship with podcasts and in his books, with highlighting some of the strategies they used to move between financial affairs, gain different income, create common goals and more.

On the podcast, Ramit and Cassandra agreed to the most difficult money conversation he had ever as a couple: negotiating prenup before marriage.

“I sweat about it now,” Ramit said. “(The first time I brought it, I remember that I talked to a lot of people, got advice, and planned what I would say and I was very tense about it.”

He said that Cassandra received the idea of ​​Prenup well, but things went south of there.

Many money experts recommend Obtaining an agreement before marriageEven for those who have modest financing. Prenup is a legal contract that explains how the couple wants to deal with their money in the event of divorce. Without one, couples can end up leaving these decisions – such as those who get certain assets or who pays marital support – Randing the judge.

Prenups for everyone, money expert Suz Orman Tell CNBC to make it In 2020, individuals should feel comfortable with their partner.

She said: “If you cannot talk about money to the person you are about to marry, you are doomed to failure because money will pass through your relationship more than anything else.”

When Ramit put the idea of ​​Prenup’s presence to Cassandra, he had already started his work and wrote his first book on money. Cassandra did not know much about them, but he was ready to learn. While both of them agreed to obtain Prenup, their negotiations have turned into a dispute due to the different expectations and the understanding of money.

Ramit saw that the negotiations are accurately financial and tried to let the numbers speak for themselves. Casandra, on the other hand, was more exploitative in emotional considerations, which Ramit was not really thinking.

He said that Ramit tried to make a “Karam” offer in his proposal before the wings, but Cassandra was more interested in their relationship and ensuring the alignment of their feelings and emotions.

“We started going back and forth and I was very confused, and I was very harmful because I love,” I am not trying to deceive anyone here. “

Cassandra ultimately suggested that the couple sit with a therapist and speak through their emotions to find out where things were not in line with. The therapist asked how each of them looked at money.

“It really opened conversations that we could not get because my answer was like,” growth, of course, look at the boat. “Ramit said her answer was,” safety. “

Although Ramtit was more focused on actual numbers, Cassandra did not have the financial knowledge to get to know Security from the sums In savings and investment accounts.

“I will never forget anything that Ramit told me at that time. I was like,” I really need to improve in money. “I took it seriously because I was like my depth,” I know I am not great in money. I can improve. “

While she worked to learn about Prenups and Money Management in general, Ramit admitted that he needed to improve talking about emotions so that he could communicate more clearly where he came and understood Cassandra’s perspective better.

“In the past, you did not ask me to withdraw the V ———-. I was feeling it,” he said. “If we look back, you need to listen to what you were saying. I should have asked more questions.”

They said that now seven years after their marriage, they are still thinking about what they learned from their negotiations in the most valuable negotiations they learned from each other.

Cassandra said Ramit’s mentality about abundance and confidence in your strength “was opening the eye.” And Ramtt is grateful to learn from Cassandra the importance of verifying and talking about your feelings.

“It really changed the way I am attached a lot,” he said.

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